.tomorrow is mine!.

Today is just one of those days.  One of those lovely little days where whatever I do, and wherever I go, I am tripping over myself.  I am not typically a negative person, but occasionally, when I get into these rut type of days... I think I get a little carried away with it. 

On these negative nancy days when something goes wrong it just seems like I am a snowball at the top of a big hill.  I left from home this morning for work after I was supposed to be there already.  My allergies are crazy right now... so I'm sporting the specs that fall off of my face all day. My head was pretty much pounding all day.  Then of course, dumb dumb dumb things bothered me all day. 

When I REALLY REALLY think about it.... none of these things are really that bad.  They are so silly.  I can suck up a headache and being late, but sometimes... just sometimes, I let this silly shit get the best of me. 

By the time I sat down with my WONDERFUL husband (who does a great job of handling these psycho days of mine) to eat a mediocre dinner that I made he showed me some pictures of a couple that had been together for years.  The husband lost his arms and legs when he was fighting for our country.  I saw several pictures of him on his wife's back as she now carried him where he needed to go.  At this point in mine and Larry's dinner I started sobbing and said, verbatim, "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?"  Then I proceeded to get up from the table and go into the bathroom and SOB. 

One word... IRRATIONAL! I know I'm irrational.  And honestly, I'm irrational every single day of my life... but usually it's in a different way.  A better way... I think.  

Here this wife is carrying her husband around and I'm crying like a psycho because I was late to work and I had a couple annoying moments in my day. Like... stop. 

Anyway, finally I come out of the bathroom and say "sorry I'm a psycho."  Then we decided to go to starbucks so I could get some school work done and Larry could read. After going to two different starbucks we finally found seats at the third starbucks we went to.  I got a chai tea latte, with whipped cream and caramel on top of the whipped cream.  I know that is totally weird. Anyway, I noticed when the barista (baristo???) rang us up he charged 60 cents for the caramel on the top.  I open my lid to disgustingly slurp off the whipped cream and caramel, which happens my favorite part of drinking hot drinks, and there is one drop of caramel.  SERIOUSLY? 

I think on a normal day I wouldn't have wanted to kick this guys teeth in... but today, I needing MY CARAMEL!  

Looking back on days like this, I always get disappointed in myself for letting silly things get to me. I'm sure this won't be my last psychotic, irrational, crying baby type of day, but I sincerely hope that as I grow older I will learn to pull it together a little better than I did today (bc I didn't at all today... so I guess that shouldn't be hard). 

It really is all about how you look at things.  I promise I know this... today, I guess I was just looking at everything through my negativity lens.  I hate to live in the future, but TOMORROW IS MINE!    

For now, benadryl and bed. 

That's all for my rant. 
NIGHT. :)