.kindness.

This past Thursday I decided to take a late night trip to Walmart for some unnecessary baking gadgets. Fifty dollars later my husband and I walk out of Walmart and begin to head home. At the red light exiting the parking lot, a homeless man approaches our car. Naturally, I locked my door. Or at least that is what came naturally to me.  After locking my door, I hear the Caucasian, five foot five inch (ish) man with a bruised eye and a patch say, "I'm not going to hurt you..." I honestly felt horrible. Although, I do need to do what I need to do to feel safe and secure, I hated that I made this man feel as if I was scared to talk to him. A split second passes, I rolled down my window and responded to his request for a dollar by saying, "I'm sorry, I don't have cash." He said, "thank you and God bless you."

The light then turned green and we drove away. Still, I felt really badly. I had a pit in my stomach and felt a sense of responsibility to make sure this man and his three friends ate on that hot Thursday night. Nearing home, I convinced Larry to turn the car around and we drive back to the homeless hot spot. We pulled up and I asked the men if they would accept food if we went to McDonalds and got them some burgers. Jacob, the self proclaimed leader of the homeless said, "we aren't in the position to turn anything down, ma'am." I told them to stay there and we would be back.

I walk in McDonalds, a total fish out of water as I haven't ordered anything from there in years. I ordered 4 burgers, 2 large fries, 20 nuggets, and the employee threw in some apple pies for free knowing where they were going. I also had a tray of 4 extra large waters.

 I walk out of the "restaurant" with a big bag of food in one arm, and a large tray in the other. On our drive back to the Walmart parking lot I was upset about forgetting napkins, and Lar assured me they wouldn't mind. I also informed Larry that I wanted to get out of the car because I didn't want them to feel that I was scared of them. We get back to Jacob, Felix, "Old man river," and "Snow." I get out of the car and give them the food and tell them to enjoy their night.

Larry and I get home, go on about our night, and go to bed. The next day I wake up and get ready for my day. My friend Stephen came to pick me up and as we went to leave I realized I had no idea where my wallet was. We looked everywhere imaginable and unimaginable for about an hour. We even fished the trash out of the dumpster and checked the garbage I threw out earlier in the day.

.... NOTHING. After a while of searching, the hunt was looking bleak. Finally I say to Stephen, "the McDonald's bag. I think I set it down in the effing McDonald's bag! I am such an idiot! " I wanted to cry.  I tell Larry what is going on as he franticly (from my perspective, calmly from his perspective) tells me to check my accounts and he will check his (because after a long lecture on how I couldn't help every homeless person I see, my wonderful, good hearted husband paid for their food and I had one of his cards in my wallet as well!) Nothing had been withdrawn from any accounts.   

Stephen and I drive back to the homeless hang out. Only one of the men were there, Felix, and he did not speak English well. I decided to leave a note with him to give to his buddy Jacob. Unlikely option, but better than no option. After writing the note and passing along to Felix, Stephen suggested that we just go into Walmart. I knew that I had my wallet after leaving there, but decided to give it a shot.

We head to customer service in Walmart and ask about my teal wallet. The first girl responded by saying, "is dat lyke, grain (green)?" The next lady says, "I think I did see some 'customers' come bring a wallet in." I decided not to get my hopes up, thinking that there was no possible way that it would be mine. 30 seconds (that seemed like a year) later a worker comes out holding my wallet. I began to cry and informed the worker that she was about to get a big ol' bear hug as I simultaneously wrapped my awkward arms around her.

I walked back over to the original employee that said she thought she had seen it and told her the wallet was returned to it's rightful owner. She then informed me that some 'unusual customers' brought it in earlier.  The employee alluded to the fact that the men were homeless.  My guess is that the 'unusual customer' was Jacob.

Every single item was exactly where it belonged in my wallet. It would have been so easy for these men to charge my credit or debit card, but they didn't. They had literally nothing to lose but their morals. In spite of the current situation they are in, they did the right thing. Aside from being ecstatic about getting my wallet back, I was inspired by Jacob & friends and their act of kindness.

Since last Friday I keep checking to see if he is in his hang out so I can thank him, no such luck just yet. I'm sure I'll see him someday soon so I can properly thank him!

 "A kind gesture can 

reach a wound 

that only 

compassion 

can heal."

.love.your.journey.

A couple of weeks ago someone asked me how my husband and I have stayed happy over the past eleven years.

There are the obvious answers, such as communication, which is undoubtedly one of the ingredients to a long lasting relationship. I suppose there is not any one thing that keeps us coming coming back for more after all of this time, but there is one main thing, in my opinion, that sustains our love.

Love your journey.

You've heard it before.  You'll hear it again. It's nothing too original, but it is undeniable.

I think it is so easy with constant accessibility to social media for couples (and individuals) to begin to feel that they are missing out. People are constantly on Instagram or Facebook. They are used to seeing they're friend's trip to Jamaica, or the new Beamer that their cousin just got, or a college friend getting engaged and having a beautiful diamond on her finger.  Let's face it, we are a generation of over sharers (myself VERY included).

The problem I do see with this is, it seems to me that we are always looking through the perfect little lens of what others are willing to share of their lives. Guess what, people most likely aren't going to Instagram a video of them having a financial argument with their spouse and NO ONE'S life is perfect.

Another thought is, when you see a photo of your old gal pal's sparkling, new, engagement ring... just be happy for her. This is a happy time in her life.  This does not necessarily mean every aspect of her life is sparkling, even if it is, just be happy for her journey while still appreciating your own.

A further observation is, to our generation, things=happiness. I sincerely believe that things and stuff is not what makes a relationship beautiful.  We often look from the outside, inward on someone's life and perceive the things that they've acquired as their level of happiness.  It's silly really.   


Okay, social media rant OVER... (hopefully).

Back to loving your journey (maybe).

In my relationship, some of the moments that I hold dearest to my heart are our moments nothingness.  I cherish our moments of gathering up all of our change (pennies included) to split a Dominoes pizza and cinnasticks.  I sincerely adore the times that we have stayed in a hotel that serves breakfast because otherwise we weren't going to have enough money to eat on our way back from a trip. 

Throughout our years together we have gradually worked together to make our lives a little more comfortable.  We are always working toward one goal, and then another, and another.  As a couple, my husband and I are not glamourous.  We don't have a lot of 'stuff' to our names.  What we do have is a journey full of moments.  

The days that I am at school from 9am to 9pm and I come home to a meal on the stove and a husband who waited for me to eat dinner together, I truly appreciate the journey.  I am so grateful to have had a long, hard day to help me see the beauty in those hours I have with him before we go to sleep.

I guess my advice is, it is not as easy to love the hard times, but it is absolutely beneficial.  Love it all. Look for things in your day and in your journey to love.  Be aware. Be grateful. Do your best to be thoughtful of your partner.  Love reaching goals, but also find joy in striving toward those goals together. 

LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR JOURNEY. 

'the journey is the destination'
-Dan Eldon

Photos above after moving to Nashville over 5 years ago. When we had no money to go out... these are the things we did. 

        

.new year. new goals.

December 31st seems to get everyone thinking, myself included.  The holidays are just about to wind down.  I have had a solid month of eating poorly and drinking more than normal.  I have had no solid routine for a good 2 weeks. I also had a fourteen hour drive with just myself and my dog to get to think about what a new year means. 

I'm not very big into New Year's Resolutions because I feel like they generally focus on the negative.  So without saying, "I'm too fat, I want to drop a pant size," I'd like to resolve to do some positive things that will overall make me a better me! :)

I'd like to continue to be silly with my husband, and laugh everyday.
I'd like to volunteer once a month as a reminder to myself of all that I have.
I'd like to treat my body the way it deserves to be treated.  I need to keep in mind that I only have one.  It's important to fuel it in the right way, and get enough sleep.  I need to go to the doctor, which I seem to always forget. 
I'd like to be kind to everyone I encounter.  I need to keep in mind that I don't know what is going on in their day, and maybe in a small way I can make a difference. 
I'd like to turn off the tv and open more books.
I'd like to write a letter once a month to someone that I don't get to keep in touch with as much as I'd like to. NOT an email, a letter. 
I'd like to write more songs, bake more cakes, and let more of my creative self out this year. 
I'd like to continue to do well in school and soak up as much knowledge as I possibly can throughout my program.
Lastly, but not absolutely not least, I REALLY want to blog more.  I think it'll be awesome to look back on my thoughts as I grow and learn. 

HAPPY TWENTY-FOUTEEN EVERYONE! 
Let's have a fabulous year!